Three questions to ask yourself before session to make the most of your therapy appointment.

It’s no secret, therapy is an investment, so if we’re going to carve out the time and money, we might as well make the most of it! One of the most effective ways to prepare for therapy is to spend 10-15 minutes before session reflecting and/or meditating.

Here are three questions to consider in your reflection time to ensure your therapy hour is used well:

1. What have I been noticing?

Consider the time in between sessions and scan for anything you noticed in yourself. If you keep a journal, reference what you reflected on in your entries. Here are some examples:

• It may be that you noticed feeling especially distressed when your boss gave you feedback about an assignment.

• Maybe you noticed being able to name an anxious thought and let it pass.

• Perhaps you noticed feeling triggered by a particular scene in the show you’re watching.

• It may be that you noticed feeling afraid when you voiced your need to your partner the other day.

You are the expert on you, so building your own self-awareness of what you experience in between therapy sessions is invaluable to the work that you’re doing with your therapist.

Where you experience distress in life indicates a potentially important area for exploration in counseling.

2. Has progress from the last session been made?

Hopefully you’re leaving therapy feeling as though new insights are coming forth, new skills are being developed, or distress is alleviating. Consider how the previous session ended and evaluate if progress in that area has further developed – or remained the same.

If your therapist made a suggestion for trying a new thing, did you try it? Was it helpful? Even if you didn’t do what your therapist suggested, consider what prevented you from trying it.

If you take notes after sessions, check back on your past session’s note.

While it can feel uncomfortable, it is okay to let your therapist know if progress hasn’t been made. Therapy ought to be a safe space to be honest about what’s working for you and what’s not, where you’re growing and where you still feel stuck.

3. What do I need from the therapy hour today?

When being introduced as a therapist, I’ve been asked if I can read minds – that would be both amazing and terrifying! Your therapist may know you well but can’t always discern what you’re needing from the therapy hour. It can be helpful to go in with some awareness of your needs. Here are some examples:

• You may need to spend the session sharing about your grief

• You may need to spend the session unpacking the dispute you had with your boyfriend

• Perhaps you need to know someone sees you and cares about what you’re feeling

• Perhaps you need a new way to calm your body when you’re triggered

• Maybe there’s a big decision coming up and you’re not sure what move to make so you need some clarity

• Or perhaps you’re needing to continue processing past traumas to alleviate the lingering distress

Whatever you’re facing, your needs are important, and you are your best resource in determining those needs. It can be difficult at first to pinpoint what we need, but even in those instances, it can be helpful to share, “I’m not sure what I need today.”

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Your time and investment in therapy matters. Make the most of it by using these three questions before each session – this will help your therapist be clued in to what’s most relevant and important to you in order to spend your time most wisely.

For what to do after session to make the most of therapy, check out this post.